Looking Back – Day 2

Today is Day Two of the Art Apple A Day Retrospective – for information on the project click here.

Day Two – October 2, 2010

I had “hit” the enter button last night. I called my husband Doug and my Mom and Dad and given them the link to the wordpress website and shared the general idea.

They are all accustomed to me and my ideas ~ the frustration and the fun of being a creative person plays out constantly with these words…

So, I’ve been thinking.

And, bless their hearts, they laugh and listen. My husband always says, “that sounds great, sweetie” every. single. time. It’s part of why I love him so much. My Dad is where I get my joie de vivre – he jumps right in hands going this way and that. And my Mom is my voice of reason. She was the first person I told and I could hear her inner thoughts, her worry.

In 2010, Doug and I were living in Elizabeth, Colorado way out in the country and 2107 miles away. She knew I was adrift and she probably worried about my health backsliding more that I did. But, she also had lived the story. She had been at a Doctor appointment where the PCP asked me how my marriage was. She felt the judgement and condescension as rawly as I did in that moment. She felt the despair that had caused her to get on a plane and travel – then – 3369 miles across the country to California to meet with that @%#&* Stanford doctor who dismissed my testimony and symptoms.

And she didn’t miss a beat in that moment. She said, “Do it, tell your story.”

She was actually worried about a million things about my plan but she, and Dad, and Doug as well as the rest of my amazing family, followed along the ups and downs of the journey to 365 daily apples. And they ALL joined me in New York City in the final days to paint the last apple!

To see my second post from 10 years ago click here or on the image above. I talk about dusting off my watercolors and how quickly I learn that plans are a difficult thing in the creative mind!

And the story will continue tomorrow!

Day One – Retrospective Post

Today is Day One of the Art Apple A Day Retrospective – for information on the project click here.

Day One – October 1, 2010

I had just been reading one of Seth Godin‘s books (who at one point I emailed and actually received an email response – gosh I wish I still had that email)

And that’s when I got a wild hair.

Truly, that was what it was because seriously… what was I possibly thinking? A piece of art every day paired with a blog post? I had no idea what I had just set myself up for.

Anyway… I had been reading his book, The Bootstrapper’s Bible, because I was at a point after years of struggling with my health that I was finally seeing that life might be able to go on. I had to figure out what the heck I was going to do with myself. I had managed first a part time job, then a full time one that required two hours of commuting a day and occasional travel and getting those jobs required some major finagling having been out of the workforce for so long. The pace I was managing is extremely difficult for anyone I told myself but I desperately did not – could not – go back to where I was before the therapy and medications started working. I realized I had to design my future in a way that could accommodate my limitations. I quit the full time job with no clear path forward.

(There is actually more to this point in the story and I’ll share it at some appropriate time during the next 364 days – it’s a doozie!)

During this crossroad, reading Mr. Godin’s book and manifesto to hopefully figure something out, the first two sentences caught me and sparked the idea:

“I am a bootstrapper. I have initiative and insight and guts, but not much money.”

~ Seth Godin

The job realization beat down what little self confidence I had built back up and I now know that being a Bootstrapper with a chronic degenerative disease was a book in and of itself and the one that might have been more appropriate but I’m the ‘leap and the net will appear’ kind of person.

Here I was, I had no money and no job. Thankfully my husband cared for me all those years I wasn’t working but we didn’t have the resources for me to launch any kind of endeavor and the what ifs were piled so high I couldn’t see past them. However, the me from “Before AS” was a bootstrapper at heart and I’ve always been called to create. Reading the manifesto I realized that if I shared my story in a small and joyful way it could be an entré to building confidence and finding my way back to myself which would lead me to design that life I was looking for.

And, so, I quickly created this extremely simple digital apple on my phone (you can see how low the quality is – this was a phone app from 10 years ago!) and posted it immediately so I wouldn’t lose my nerve! I was afraid if I waited to the following day to create in the traditional way I was proposing, that I would talk myself out of, “Art Apple A Day” and I can’t even imagine my life now, without this being a part of me and the AS community.

To see my first post from 10 years ago click here or on the image above.

And the story will continue tomorrow!